If… And that is a BIG IF… I was in a better mood (than I am in right now) those two words would have made me chide myself for being so petty…. And the same question would have made me break into the soulful melody by Shaggy , if I was in a "good" mood!!!
The ultra horrible geumpy mood that I am in right now… Leads me to repeat the question… Turn it over and over in my mind… Keep in dangled in mid air… And fret over it CONTINUOSLY!!!
Why???? Well I have sufficient reason for cribbing… I have literally been 'Ms Goody Two Shoes' aaaaaalllllll my life. I was always punctual, never ever broke any rules, ranked amongst top three in class throughout school, never partied and stayed out late, was sincere and perseverent in every task I took up… College saw me in the same way, no boyfriends, no partying, no smoking or drinking… My first job appraisal mentioned me as hard working and committed. All through… I have never hurt anyone, or spoken/wished anyone ill, never lied to harm, never ever done anything wrong knowingly… And all this boils down to the question- why me????
Why do I have so so so many struggles to go through… I just can't catch a break… In school I had to struggle with the fact that I never had any friends… Then it was my being the odd one since I had no vices… Then it was one mean boss after the other!!! Right now I have no future to look forward to… All I see is my life fading into obscurity….
I look around and I see people get the choiciest of stuff handed out to them on silver plates without even asking and I wonder… And I also question the grand plan that god has prepared for me…
If I was a little bit happier… I might have taken these struggles to be learning experiences… But right now… The glass is definitely half empty.. What the hell… It s completely empty from where I stand….
Sent from my Nokia phone